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I believe that all women looking to hold their baby or child in their arms should be given maximum support possible, Whether you're conceiving "naturally" (isn't it all natural??!), or with the help of a fertility clinic, with or without using a surrogate or even through adoption, I'm here for you and with a decade of experience and a friendly smile.
Energetically the principles of conception are very much the same whether you use your own womb or someone else's. The same mental and emotional rollercoaster situation applies (if not more so in some ways) and acupuncture and hypnotherapy can help you navigate your way into calm waters to get that much loved baby/child into your arms - whatever the journey you take.
Both acupuncture and hypnotherapy is also a fantastic way to drop the stress and relax...so no matter the route you take, regular Stems and Branches acupuncture or hypnotherapy will help you cope with all the stresses and strains of doing so.
I also have an understanding of what it's like to be the partner that isn't carrying or giving birth to the baby. At times I felt like a spare part, or worried whether I would feel that bonded to my baby when they did arrive. As usual, all my worries were unfounded, and acupuncture and/or hypnotherapy can help you with these times if you are in a similar situation.
As with women, around 60% of infertility in men is unexplained, and it's thought that for heterosexual couples having difficulty conceiving, that male sub/infertility is a factor in 50-70% of cases.
Sperm numbers and quality in the UK male population have been declining quite alarmingly over the last few decades. What is regarded as a "normal" sperm sample may not have been classified as "normal" 40 years ago. Pollutants, plastics and hormones in the water have all been implicated. Regular acupuncture can help play a role in increasing sperm quality.
Hypnotherapy and acupuncture is also an easy way to help you cope with any stresses or worries you may have about starting/enlarging the family. Not to mention for those men who are coping with living with their partner whilst pregnant! I've also met men that are carrying a lot of guilt or shame for seemingly "making" their partner go through fertility treatment because they think it's their fault e.g. poor sperm quality.
Funny how all your fears, insecurities and general stresses in life get multiplied a gazillion times as soon as you realise that baby ain't coming along as quickly as you had hoped! It really is quite shocking that most women I meet that have been "TTC" for a particular period of time feel very despondent and not in control of the situation. The period of time in question is a very unique, personal thing. I've met women that are fed-up that baby hasn't come along after many years and women that are just as fed-up after several months of "TTC".
The fantastic news is that all that tension, worry, anger, jealousy, even grief that gets accumulated along this "fertility journey" is INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT. It's very much needed to help push and change you into the person that you are soooo longing to be.
The next bit of fantastic news is that acupuncture and hypnotherapy are both excellent at boosting your chances of conceiving. Improving your body and mindset to a more chilled out positive one, gets that cortisol and adrenaline levels right down, and so improves your hormonal balance. I frequently hear from my fertility acupuncture patients that when they added in the acupuncture they felt more in control of their life, plus had fewer side effects from any IVF drugs and had a better response in terms of womb lining thickness and eggs collected and fertilised.
Also, for most of us, unfortunately a fair bit of grief is involved with "TTC". Miscarriage and baby loss is sadly quite common and often not talked about that much, I know, or rather my wife especially knows, that it is possible to continue on that fertility rollercoaster whilst nursing a broken heart and a huge amount of grief for a lost baby. Again, acupuncture and hypnotherapy and the other techniques that I use, can help you carry and live with the grief whilst pausing for a bit, or when carrying on with conceiving.
Phew! You've got that wonderful positive test result....EEK! Now what? Sit down , have a cuppa (booze is now out) and book some pregnancy acupuncture and/or hypnotherapy sessions with me. Acupuncture and hypnotherapy is safe to have right from the very first trimester and can help with "morning" sickness, aches or pains or any anxieties that suddenly spring up. For some, getting pregnant wasn't that much of a concern (in hindsight!)...it's the initial worrying stages of staying pregnant, or coping with it, that's now the issue.
Acupuncture is an effective way to help manage any associated pregnancy problems such as morning sickness (which is a very misleading name!), back, pelvic or any other pain. Not to mention help relieve any stress and tension that can build up with being pregnant whilst still working or looking after other children. Hypnotherapy too has it's place, not only because it's just soooo relaxing!
All of a sudden "the birth" is soon upon you and those endless days of trying to fall pregnant, or the long first trimester might now seem a very distant memory. Both acupuncture and hypnotherapy can help you relax and get into the right mindset for birth. Acupuncture, alongside "moxibustion" (a gentle heat stick), is also often used to help the baby turn and to encourage contractions and the birth process to start (when required).
If just thinking or reading about the birth is increasing your anxiety then it is possible to easily change your mindset so that you become very calm and even ridiculously excited about giving birth! Pain free childbirth is very much a thing too and hypnotherapy and/or acupuncture sessions leading up to birth, and use of acupressure points during it, can help achieve this. Do not go into labour in a panicked state - it will increase your pain...get prepared!
Why not get your body, and mindset "birth ready" and book in?
Congratulations - you've made it through the birth! How are you? No, really how are you? The range of different experiences that women have leading up to and during pregnancy, I think is matched by the range of experiences of the birth and the post-natal period. For some, it all goes well, with loads of family support. For others there can be some intense trauma or emotions associated with it, and even without any trauma, the whole thing is downright knackering! I also believe that we're expected to run the equivalent of a marathon, with little preparation, no food given during and then expected to look after and keep alive the teeny tiniest human being possible! Oh, and without any uninterrupted sleep! The Chinese traditions include shutting the house off to visitors for the first month post-birth to allow mum to recover. So what do we tend to do in the UK? Yep all rush round to see baby (and mum possibly too) for the first few weeks and then generally, mum is left to get on with things after that. So please do, somehow, find a way to make sure you get some 1:1 sessions with a therapist. Obviously I'm advocating acupuncture and hypnotherapy! However, any form of holistic treatment will be crucial to help you recover and cope in as sane a way as possible for the following months (and years!) after the birth. Don't suffer in silence, reach out and get that TLC your body and mind needs.
I have gone through the trials and tribulations of trying to conceive a "Mini Me" and fully understand the difficulties of keeping an optimistic, positive mindset. In fact, it was a session of hypnotherapy during one particular low point in my fertility journey, that convinced me of the simple power of it. My first IUI took the poor nurse an hour and in the end they called the consultant in!!! Quite funny in hindsight. After that point, I had special treatment in that only a consultant would do the IUI. I struggled on, every month going back for the next one. Then I had some hypnotherapy and from that point onwards that IUI catheter flew in so fast, that it took the first unsuspecting consultant by surprise!! So hypnotherapy, and the ability you have to control your body with your mind is powerful stuff.
Although every woman's TTC journey is unique, I have had two miscarriages and my wife lost our beautiful daughter, Eleanor, at 21 weeks of pregnancy. It's incredibly challenging and humbling to realise that the only thing you can give your daughter as she lays in your hands, fading away, is your love and total 100% presence. So although losing Eleanor was a hugely traumatic and awful time, her birth was just as magic and wonderful as it was with our two other kids. The early weeks afterwards where we just came together as a family of three, and shut out the world, were so heavy with the present moment and lack of a future, yet I wouldn't re-write any of it. My wife of course, may have a different view, because that's the thing - everyone has their own perspective on life, irrespective of the shared experience.
So have no fear! It is possible to alter a grieving, doubting or even obsessive mindset, (whether you think the past gives you good reason or not) and I can show you how.
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